i wanna know how deep you can get. i wanna know how you really feeling.
No holding back this is what i need. I need you to take me as i am, no changing no complaining.
I am the over emotional, always stressing, nothing is perfect, crazy white girl who sets no boundries and lives for the moment but can be serious yet still acts like a lil kid.
I can't help who i am and i dont expect people to like it all. when yu take me you take all of me.
you can't change me nor will i do so because of what you don't like.
i bottle everything up inside and it wont come out unless its forced. i get these pains because of it and will never let it show.
i wanna be liked because of who i am not because of what can be changed about me.
there is no other girl like me and this is what you like about me dont let it go to waste.
I AM WHO I AM NOT WHAT ANY ONE WANTS ME TO BE
so tell me what is it all worth?
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Thursday, June 2, 2011
Dead feelings
I have to lie to protect my self. It is just something you wont understand.
Summer is starting off OKAY i guess. All i hear is the bitter sounds of your disappointment, the fact that i can never be good enough for you says a lot.
The trembling in your voice every time you say my name like your scared.
Ice cold stares when i walk by
your personality is like a daemon when you are next to me, corrupted by evil and destined for darkness.
Summer is starting off OKAY i guess. All i hear is the bitter sounds of your disappointment, the fact that i can never be good enough for you says a lot.
The trembling in your voice every time you say my name like your scared.
Ice cold stares when i walk by
your personality is like a daemon when you are next to me, corrupted by evil and destined for darkness.
Sunday, May 1, 2011
New Infatuation
He has a very clam personality, his eyes shine when he looks up. I dont think i have ever liked someone as much as i like him.
the feelings are mutual. but no mater who or what it is you have to take it with a grain of salt.
he is not always around but when i talk to him i feel like it is so peaceful. he is different form the other guys in the group. more mature.
He stands out from the rest, he makes me smile
I don't like labels put on me, so i will say i am your woman but i am my own person.
His words bring influence to my world, a very independent person who knows what he wants.
I can say that he is the one i want, for years or months saying i do not want to deal with a boyfriend or relationship i think i might have found one that has changed my mind.
i am sorry i wont do any of that kiddy stuff like the date we started going out or the two innicials together and then forever. How it moves on it's own is how we will take it.
Till next time
manda
the feelings are mutual. but no mater who or what it is you have to take it with a grain of salt.
he is not always around but when i talk to him i feel like it is so peaceful. he is different form the other guys in the group. more mature.
He stands out from the rest, he makes me smile
I don't like labels put on me, so i will say i am your woman but i am my own person.
His words bring influence to my world, a very independent person who knows what he wants.
I can say that he is the one i want, for years or months saying i do not want to deal with a boyfriend or relationship i think i might have found one that has changed my mind.
i am sorry i wont do any of that kiddy stuff like the date we started going out or the two innicials together and then forever. How it moves on it's own is how we will take it.
Till next time
manda
Sunday, April 24, 2011
My school friends
Wow so the school year is almost done, i dont know weather to be sad or happy.
i am so glad that i have chosen to go back to school.
I have meet some awesome people this year. They have become my college FAM
the memories that we create are precious
Random conversations in the caff
movie trips
Ramen
crazy Parties (KEys)
They are just amazing, they are all different no two people are the same and thats what makes us so unique.
we each have something that makes the whole a great group
I love everyone of them
i am so glad that i have chosen to go back to school.
I have meet some awesome people this year. They have become my college FAM
the memories that we create are precious
Random conversations in the caff
movie trips
Ramen
crazy Parties (KEys)
They are just amazing, they are all different no two people are the same and thats what makes us so unique.
we each have something that makes the whole a great group
I love everyone of them
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
A new Leaf
There is only 2 and half days left untill 2011.
I started over new.
I made up with my mom and i am gettin to know my step father better. it turns out he is a really cool guy. Tho i only have 1 mother and 1 father, it is pretty cool to have back up parents. there is alot of things i can learn from him when it comes to technology.
I kmoe that you are not suppose to have a favorite and that's ok but when it comes to being at ma moms house i have realize that i am more calmer around ma mom, even tho i may not like her at times, there is always something i can find that she is more cooler.
Being at ma moms house i have the opportunity to do things i cant at ma dads. Its sad to say but at ma dads i feel like there are rules that a person at my age should not have to follow. it feels to much like a house that is made for a child with a curfew and rules.( like time limit on computer and video games or be in bed at a certain time) i feel like i have more freedom at ma moms.
you never realize how much you need someone till u dont have them in your life and that could be for a few mins or a a few months. it just aint the same when they are not there.
now on to my love life......................
i may say all the time i dont want a boyfriend or a relationship and i have my reason for that.
The person i have fell in love with was always out of reach, that is until now.
I am going to take every chance i can get to make this work the right way, some have said that he is not what i want him to be but they just dont understand what is going on.
being with a man that has a child is not always easy and i understand that. but when you love someone yu find ways to make it work.
I am now 22 years old and i am not getting any younger. i am going to start over new and do what i have to do for me.
A NEW YEAR A NEW MEE amd alot of ppl say that and dont act on it. well me i am deffinettly going to acct on it.
so until next time
Happy new year everyone
I started over new.
I made up with my mom and i am gettin to know my step father better. it turns out he is a really cool guy. Tho i only have 1 mother and 1 father, it is pretty cool to have back up parents. there is alot of things i can learn from him when it comes to technology.
I kmoe that you are not suppose to have a favorite and that's ok but when it comes to being at ma moms house i have realize that i am more calmer around ma mom, even tho i may not like her at times, there is always something i can find that she is more cooler.
Being at ma moms house i have the opportunity to do things i cant at ma dads. Its sad to say but at ma dads i feel like there are rules that a person at my age should not have to follow. it feels to much like a house that is made for a child with a curfew and rules.( like time limit on computer and video games or be in bed at a certain time) i feel like i have more freedom at ma moms.
you never realize how much you need someone till u dont have them in your life and that could be for a few mins or a a few months. it just aint the same when they are not there.
now on to my love life......................
i may say all the time i dont want a boyfriend or a relationship and i have my reason for that.
The person i have fell in love with was always out of reach, that is until now.
I am going to take every chance i can get to make this work the right way, some have said that he is not what i want him to be but they just dont understand what is going on.
being with a man that has a child is not always easy and i understand that. but when you love someone yu find ways to make it work.
I am now 22 years old and i am not getting any younger. i am going to start over new and do what i have to do for me.
A NEW YEAR A NEW MEE amd alot of ppl say that and dont act on it. well me i am deffinettly going to acct on it.
so until next time
Happy new year everyone
Saturday, December 11, 2010
The end is near
OK so its been w really long time since i have been on here, i know shame on me.
But hey a gurl has to do what she has to do to survive on the streets lol.
so the semester is almost over like dead ass onli a week to go. it was a pretty easy half of the year, sort of looking forward towards the spring. so many different and hard classes to take.
-Pre Cal
-Phsyc
-Eng Comp 2
-Speach
-Bio
so yea thats what i got in the spring.
Stuff that got me sad
-JOvie is moving to PR :( but hey look at it this way i got some where to go for spring break. :)
-I am gonna be 22 in two weeks time so flys so quick
-I miss my lil man so much :*(
when they say what ever dont kill you makes you stronger, they are so right because so many things come into your life to try and stop you from getting to where you wanna go and its up to you if its gonna stop you or not.
wellll i am gonna make a promiss that i am gonna write more on here so you guys knoes whats up
tata for now
But hey a gurl has to do what she has to do to survive on the streets lol.
so the semester is almost over like dead ass onli a week to go. it was a pretty easy half of the year, sort of looking forward towards the spring. so many different and hard classes to take.
-Pre Cal
-Phsyc
-Eng Comp 2
-Speach
-Bio
so yea thats what i got in the spring.
Stuff that got me sad
-JOvie is moving to PR :( but hey look at it this way i got some where to go for spring break. :)
-I am gonna be 22 in two weeks time so flys so quick
-I miss my lil man so much :*(
when they say what ever dont kill you makes you stronger, they are so right because so many things come into your life to try and stop you from getting to where you wanna go and its up to you if its gonna stop you or not.
wellll i am gonna make a promiss that i am gonna write more on here so you guys knoes whats up
tata for now
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Summer so far
Ok so i know its been a while since i have been on but let me tell you summer is going good so far.
I got a job in a law firm thru the summer youth and OMG its great. My bosses are very nice and both are females. One is a entertainment lawyer and the other one is real estate. Its a small cozy office nothing to big.
I got accepted into City Tech, so happy about that and then Manika aka ma bestie is having me join a sorority. So with that i am going to be a Gamma Nu Delta.
Other then that my twin was down here for a while so that made me happy. Boys i am not really worring about them right now because this is the summer time to have fun and no worries.
With this job i hope to get some more experience and a good letter of reference or a letter of recommendation. I try to get as much out of certain things as possible because you don't know how they may affect you when you are older.
tilll later
<3 ya
I got a job in a law firm thru the summer youth and OMG its great. My bosses are very nice and both are females. One is a entertainment lawyer and the other one is real estate. Its a small cozy office nothing to big.
I got accepted into City Tech, so happy about that and then Manika aka ma bestie is having me join a sorority. So with that i am going to be a Gamma Nu Delta.
Other then that my twin was down here for a while so that made me happy. Boys i am not really worring about them right now because this is the summer time to have fun and no worries.
With this job i hope to get some more experience and a good letter of reference or a letter of recommendation. I try to get as much out of certain things as possible because you don't know how they may affect you when you are older.
tilll later
<3 ya
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